Last Goodbyes
by Yoko's love
Summary: I stand at his grave now, as I speek my last words... I love you...


**Last goodbyes**

**By Yoko's Love**

**I do not own Gravitation, or any of the characters. I wish I did tho! ENJOY THE STORY!**

**P.S. My computer's Spell Check is not working, so please forgive the miss spelt words. Thank you.**

**By the way, this is in Shuichi's point of view**

I cant believe it. Here I stand on stage, people asking me for an encore. My name is know all over the world, and everyone knows who Shuichi Shindo is.

Where did the time go? Just a year ago, I was a striving artist, trying to make it to the big times. And here I am now, standing on stage, everyone cheering for me, screaming my name…

As I stumble off of stage, I walk down the stairs, Hiro coming to greet me. "Way to go Shuichi! That was the best yet!" He congratulated me… Saying that my lyrics will be known all over the world! Our new song that we put out tonight, everyone will be asking for a new song to be put out on a CD.

I don't even remember writing it… I must have been high, or drunk one… That's what we all do when were done at concerts. We celibrate by forgetting what's going on in our lives, and party.

My hearts racing, I can feel the air around me, cooling my sweating body. Walking oh so slowly to the bathroom, I place each of my hands at the side of the cink, my head throbbing.

Turning on the cold water, I splash myself, my burning eyes cooling. My face is throbbing as well, I can feel it. Am I really this person staring back at me in this mirror?

Looking in the reflection, I think of him… Yuki. I smile. I can remember him, as we looked out the window after seeing gunshots, him wrapping his warm arms around me, and holding out tickets to the carnivile. That day was a blast, but the ending was a disaster.

He lives in New York, where he can live as a novelist, as he said he wanted to. We went seprite ways is all… He continued his career, and I started mine… I wonder if he thinks of me… Or even remembers my name.

"Shuichi! C'mon! Its time to go to the club." I here Hiro call for me from outside the door. Drying my face with a towel, I step out the door, giving a cute smile to Hiro. He was always happy to see me smile. He was so sweet to me… and was the only one who understood my feelings for Yuki still excisted.

Hiro put his arm around me, making us look like we were drinking buddies, and gave me a comferting smile, "Alright Mr. Shuichi! Its time to go out and have fun." Nodding, I glanced over at him, "Yeah... Fun." Hiro eyed me, unsure if his desission that I was depressed or not was correct. "Whats wrong Bud?" he asked.

"I thought about him again" Hiro sighed, as K called our names, telling us to hurry or were going to miss the ride to the club. Hiro looked at me, and I just nodded and gave a cheerful smile, like always, "Go ahead. I'll catch up later." Hiro gave a hyperactive smile, and a kiss on the cheek, skipping toward K, slightly dancing as he did, "Oh lovely ladys! Here I come!" He said happily.

I knew Hiro cared about me, but I wanted him to have fun, and he understood.

Taking a seat at a random bench, a sighed, running my fingers threw my pink hair, remembering Yuki had done the same to me before. Why am I thinking of him so much, and at a time like this? My career is hitting off, Im the top of the charts, so why? Why am I depressed...?

"HEY SHUICHI!" I heard a loud voice call my name. It was Ryuichi. I didnt have to look up to know that. "Hey Ryuichi" I said almost silently. His normal happy smile died, as he took a seat next to me. "Whats wrong Shu-chan?" He asked cutely, like always.

"Hehe, nothing! Why would anything be wrong?" I put on my happy face and tilted my head to the side. Ryuichi, I think knew it was fake, but smiled back, "Nevermind then!" Everyone knew to leave me alone when I'm depressed, or not to ask questions about it, even if they knew something was wrong. I would get over it soon anyways.

"How about you come to my place?" Asked my friend next to me. I stood up and nodded in agreement. What a fine idea. Maybe then I'll be able to get him off my mind.

About 30 min and, after getting threw all the crowed that had been awaiting me, and about 1000 atagraphs later, we made it to Ryu-chan's place. It was a very large place, and to big for one person. But Ryuichi didnt mind. He practicly had atleast one person with him at all times. And sometimes, even a male that he thought was cute during a consert. He never seemed the type to me, but I guess everyones got the urge to bring someone home now and again.

With me tho, it was different... I dont care who takes me home or who I take home every night... Its as if no one cares about me, other than to fuck me. No, I know alot of people care, and Ryuichi is one of those people, and so is Hiro... But I would give those up... as much I hate to say that, just to have my Yuki back.

I made a mistake, falling inlove with that man... And what worse, I ruined my life. I need to learn to get over whats in the past... And move on... Thats what I keep telling myself. But even then, I think of him more... He was my first true love, and thats something no one can take away from me.

I glanced over at Ryuichi, who was drinking some wine. He gave me a funny smile, telling me that he was already drunk. Giggling, I gave him one of my normal smiles, hiding the fact that I was depressed inside. "Your so cute Shuichi." He told me, making my cheeks go blood red.

Soon, I could feel his warm hands gestering down my body, reaching between my pants. It was no shock to me, for he has done these things before. I didnt mind one bit. It was weird tho. When I glanced down, I didnt see Ryuichi... No, I saw Yuki...

"St-... Stop..." I managed to get out, fighting the urge to want to continue. I knew it was my mind playing tricks on me, but it was as if Yuki was right there, touching me like he used to.

Ryuichi instently stopped. He knew I didnt want it. Confused, he asked me a simple question. "Did I do something wrong?"

I shook my head, as soon as I came back to reality. "Nothings wrong... Nothing at all." I said, putting on my fake smile once again. Of course, he could tell it was fake... I had been around him for almost two years now... why wouldnt he notice something so dumb?

He knew I was thinking of him... And I wanted him back. He ignored this fact tho, and just stood up, smiling, "I think I'll head to my bed!" With those words, he climbed the stairs, leading to his room, and shut the door behind him.

I watched him, and smiled. He was cute, and I knew that he was just doing what was best for me. Avoiding the subject.

Grabbing my coat that lay near the door, I made my way out the door, for a walk. Something that I had the intendency to do every night now.

The heals of my shoes stomped across the hard pavement. They reminded me of the beat to Rage Beat... A song that was inspired by him. "DAMN IT! GET OUT OF MY MIND!" I yelled loudly. I couldnt stand him always beeing there. Like looking down appon me. Tho, even if this was true, I wanted him to be there for me... To want me, and to hold me one last time...

Soon, I felt myself bumb into someone. Instently, I said I was sorry. But then, when I did, my heart stopped, as soon as my eyes met with his. "Those eyes could kill someone" I said, accodently out loud.

The man wouldnt take his eyes off of me, as I wrapped my arms around him, tears running down my face. "Yuki..." I sobbed. I finaly had fount him... He was back... In my life... For good. I wouldnt let him go.

The next few moments in my life, I shall never forget. Those cold words, that sliced threw my heart as if it was air. "I'm sorry... Do I know you...?" Was all he said to me.

I fell to my knees, slipping down his body intill I hit the ground. I held on to his legs, begging him to remember who I was. He had forgotten me... Why... What did I do wrong...?

I could feel is cold stair at the back of my head. It was as if he was burning a hole threw my brain. He backed away, and gave me a glar, "Leave me alone, you stupid Baka." Was all he said, as he walked down, into the darkness.

It was only then I relized where we both stood. It was in the park, where me and him had first met. This was how it was...? I met you here, and now your leaving me...?

Picking myself up, I walked back to Shuichi's place. Dropping to my knees, I cryed. I cryed his name, and wished he had never said those words to me.Wished for him to had never met me... To had just left me alone. Ryuichi came down stiars, running to my side, asking me what was wrong. Alls I said was, "Do I know you...?" In a depressing cry.

The years have passed now, and my career as a singer is over. I've retired from that. I've relized why he said those words to me... Why he spoke such painful things. It was so I could move on...

I believe he knew I still felt for him. And he did the same for me. But in order for us both to move on, from what once was, he had to sacrafice our love... The only thing that was holding me back...

I still have feelings, for Eiri Yuki, and I believe I always will. But those feelings of love, are burried beneath memories, and scars, that shall always keep me safe.

I dont think I would traid the feeling I have for him for anything. Because if it wasnt for him, I wouldnt be, where I am today. He was the one, who inspired me. The one who pushed me to go on. And I will keep those memories of us, forever.

So I stand over his grave, looking down at him, smiling. Knowing he did us both a favor... Taking a deep breath, I throw the roses I had for him, and begain to walk away, saying my last words, "I love you..."

**This was a very hard story to write. It's been on my computer for about a month now, and I finaly finished it. I hope you enjoyed it. I enjoyed writing it! Thanks for reading! Be sure to tell me what you think! I was thinking about writing another chapter, in Yuki's point of view, or something. Tell me your ideas on that as well! Thank you.**


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